Feature Article
A Culture of Arrogance and Disrespect
by Anjuelle Floyd
The latest story of a male spewing disrespectful and painful statements at a female involves two-time NBA champion player, NBA Hall of Fame member, General Manager of the New York Knicks, and Coach of the Knicks, Isiah Thomas. Thomas was accused by a former female executive, Anucha Browne-Sanders, of repeatedly calling her a bitch and a ho in private conversations. She added, “After a game of basketball, Thomas declared his love for me,” which seems an about-face of character for him. Thomas was brought to court and was subsequently found guilty of the alleged actions of sexual harassment. But the juxtaposition remains puzzling to those who seek to understand why anyone of Thomas’s stature and reputation would behave in such conflicting ways.
What is especially sad about this narrative is that, prior to conviction, Thomas, an African American, distinguished his use of the derogatory words bitch and ho—when speaking to Ms. Browne-Sanders or any other African American woman—as different from that of Don Imus, a white male commentator who last spring referred to the Rutgers women basketball players as “nappy headed ho's.” In his deposition, Thomas explained that while he was comfortable using the words bitch and ho in the presence of African American women, he would not tolerate white men using the same terms in the presence of women of his race. For Thomas, the reason is simple. Due to rapes committed by white male slave masters upon African American female slaves, a horrible history exists between African American women and white American males. The words bitch and ho are exhumed and enlivened when white males use those terms in the presence of or in reference to African American females. That Thomas does not tolerate.
But it seems he is comfortable with sexually harassing an African-American female co-worker and maintaining the sexually hostile work environment that the white male owner of the Knicks and Madison Square Garden, James L. Dolan, perpetuated. One can understand if not empathize with Thomas in his efforts to distinguish his use of the above expletives based on his race. But actions always speak louder than words. In his deposition, James L. Dolan candidly stated he fired Ms. Browne-Sanders for what he termed, interfering with the internal investigation researching her complaints, as the investigation was taking place. The entire scenario reeks of hypocrisy and cover-up.
The caustic residuals from America’s tortured past are indeed alive and thriving in the 21st century. But that Thomas, an African American male, would see no apparent harm in speaking to another member of his ethnic group (one that has long endured mistreatment and dehumanization at the hands of the larger Eurocentric American culture and society, and against which both rail) speaks volumes as to where the consciousness of African Americans has dissipated and regressed in the aftermath of integration. If human suffering is to render one more empathetic and sensitive to the needs of others, then we as African Americans, in assimilating into the larger culture, have become the very thing against which we scream. And for that we are hypocrites, not just to the larger American culture, but to the world at large. We cannot expect to establish and maintain any amount of integrity by acting this way. In fact just the opposite occurs. We as African Americans come to look like the very oppressors we criticize.
Isiah Thomas was a student under the famed Indiana basketball coach, Bobby Knight, who some say was only fired when it became clear Coach Knight could no longer consistently compete for the NCAA title in men’s basketball—not because of his severe, disrespectful, and physically abusive treatment of college players on his team. Had he improved his win-loss record, he might have remained basketball coach at Indiana, instead of coaching at Texas Tech. One might wonder why any school would place him in charge of young adults.
But America is about winning. Ms. Browne-Sanders pled with Thomas, as she stated in court, “We need to work together…Where else in professional sports do you have an African American president of the Garden, an African American president of the team, and an African American vice president of the team? It is a tremendous message for minorities.” One may wonder about the message Ms. Browne-Sanders, an executive in her own right, is sending to African Americans—both women and men—who are courteous and respectful, when she felt Thomas deserved a plea. This is not to present Ms. Browne-Sanders as a victim. In the battle of life, there are no victims and villains, heroines or heroes—only women and men who are willing to come to terms with the wrongs that have been done to them, and in accepting that over which they possessed no control, begin to treat themselves with the respect they have so long been denied.
Neither African Americans nor anyone else of this land can achieve respect when they do not give it, least of all when they do not exhibit it toward themselves. That Ms. Browne-Sanders termed her position as an executive for the New York Knicks as her “dream job” is perplexing. How much of an actual dream involves being the target of sexual advances from a man who addresses you in private as a bitch or a ho?
Despite her “rave reviews and pay hikes,” Ms. Browne-Sanders spoke to higher-ups at the Knicks franchise concerning Thomas’s behavior, and was repeatedly told to “accommodate him.”
But what of Ms. Browne-Sanders? Was no one to accommodate her? The jurors saw legitimacy in spreading blame for what Ms. Browne Sanders underwent. And that is good. Perhaps we are waking up. The owner of the New York Knicks and the Knicks’ chairman was ordered to pay Ms. Browne-Sanders $11,000,000 for “allowing her to work in a hostile environment.” Jurors deemed Thomas liable for sexual harassment against Ms. Browne-Sanders. And that, too, is good. Certainly Mr. Thomas was not working alone.
We are not free in America. Not any of us. We will not be free until we realize the greatest wealth anyone can amass is the ability to love and give respect for the lives and strivings of others. We also must understand that our destructive acts and words that engender fear and despair do more to destroy us than our recipients. I wonder how Mr. Thomas would feel if his daughter were to come home and tell him that a man, any man—or woman for that matter—spoke to her the way he did to and or in the presence of Ms. Browne-Sanders.
And then there is Ms. Browne-Sanders. I wonder what her husband has to say about all of this. And how do her children feel, knowing someone spoke to their mother that way?
As it has so many times in America, money took precedence over giving, receiving, and demanding self-respect of others and of ourselves. Why is it we are told to be strong and that we are resilient when we remain in situations where men and other women demean us, and consequently, each other? Ms. Browne-Sanders is not an uneducated woman with limited employment opportunities. With her “rave reviews” perhaps she could have secured a lateral executive position in a more respectful environment. Or are we to assume that what she underwent is the nature of working in corporate America, whether female or male? In any case, I cannot imagine that her husband was thrilled to see her working in such a demeaning and disrespectful environment.
Isiah Thomas, rich and famous, felt he was above exhibiting respect and dignity toward others. Or was he simply holding the line for the status quo. Clearly, he took the example of his former coach, Bobby Knight, while at the same time seeing himself as different if only due to race.
Ms. Browne-Sanders felt her work ethic and loyalty to our culture required she try to work through her situation—the situation that exists in our country. And we must change it, for the sake of our people—for all of us. When will we come to value the people in our lives—those with whom we live and work, and even ourselves—above our titles and whom we think we should be? What lessons can we as Americans take from this situation that is played and replayed too often in all corners of our communities? I can only wonder what our children will think of us when hundreds of years from now they read of these incidents.
I know what I feel at present—a severe shame to be a citizen of a country many say is the richest on earth. A nation forever accusing other governments and societies of crimes against humanity, while our citizens daily dole out stinging words and injurious behaviors wrapped in their beliefs that the ability to receive and tolerate them is evidence of one’s fortitude and veracity of character.
Ms. Floyd is a licensed psychotherapist,wife, mother and painter. A graduate of Duke University, with a MA in Psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies in San Francisco, California and MFA in Creative Writing from Goddard College, Port Townsend, Washington. Her first novel, Keeper of Secrets...Translations of an Incident is available at bookstores nationwide and on Amazon. Visit her at: http://www.anjuellefloyd.com/